C'mon Son

For real? Everybody is gonna trip on this man because he was epicly infidelous to his wife? Sure the text messages were a bit much. But every man has a much more rugged sexual nature than he is willing to admit in the public eye. Yes, he and Elin have children together but generally most gold diggers marry and have children with their prey. Not that Elin Woods is a golddigger. *cough* Sure some of the porn stars and call girls were not the most attractive whores on the planet, but the man plays golf for Christ's sake. He's not going to have video vixens parading around as his mistress. Of course we're all a bit disappointed in seeing another "clean-nosed" celebrity and athlete getting his nostrils a little clogged but that doesn't mean that the media has to make it so he can't breathe. Leave Eldrick Tont Woods alone! He's a man. A human being capable of error just like the rest of us. No I don't that what he is did was right, but why do people keep acting as though they're so disgusted with someone's character like he's not the most interesting thing to happen to golf since they decided to give those motherfuckers an ugly green jacket as a "prize" instead "punishment." Who else would make you give a rat's ass about the PGA Tour or the Master's Tournament? Phil Mickelson? That other fat guy with the combover? Hell no. So leave that man alone. He will still be able to finish in the top 3 of that tournament. He will still maintain the majority of his endorsement deals (if the media shuts the hell up) and he will still get some groupie ass on the side. Tiger, you shoulda took a page from the purple-suit-wearing character on The Boondocks, because A Pimp Named Slickback wouldn't have had all his bitches talking on the news like that. I know you mad right now Tiger, but this wouldn't even have happened if you were messing round wit some black women. I'm just sayin.

The Lord Know My Heart

Yall all know the ones I'm talkin bout. Those Sunday Morning Christians that get all in the aisle shouting at the altar talking bout "the Holy Ghost got hold of me." Those ones. I'm so over them. They talk a mean game bout how they can't wait to get to Heaven but they know they aren't anywhere near the Lord throughout the week. I know a few of these "Saints" personally. I might've even been one of them in my former life, but they spend a good deal of time living in the world. What's that about kinfolk? They be on that bullshit. Drinking all during the week. Flagging down any voice of discernment you toss at them talkin bout "judge ye not." And that's the only scripture their inebriated asses ever took the time to learn. A mess. Gambling and buying Lotto tickets, but you don't even believe in tithing. Yelling at every body to read the Bible, but the only time that Book gets cracked open is when your "Saved Friends" come over and yall study word. But you be boozing up right after they leave and miss church service half the time because you be so gone. Yeah, the Lord may forgive you for messing every once in a while, but Sunday Morning Praise aint no excuse for Saturday night fever, so to speak. The only excuse that they ever can manage to give is "the Lord know my heart." Whatever you say, Drunky McLiarpants. The next time you in the sanctuary though, shouting bout the Goodness of a God you don't know, I hope he strikes you down right where you stand. I aint judging. I'm just sayin